Indian Institute of Pleasing Management

Indian Institute of Pleasing Management

(This is an informatorial and this kind of an advertisement is especially written as an informative journalistic article only because these days, no one believes an advertisement anymore, and therefore the editorial board of this magazine is in full cahoots.)

Quality Education + Skill Enhancement at a very affordable cost.

International Business Strategy Analysts and Professional Surveyors have projected that the future leaders of Indian Economy tomorrow will be those who would have the effortless ability to elicit trust from others. An important trust building contraption, by the same experts, has been “meticulously calculated” using latest malleable statistical devices, to be a warm smile. 

An exclusive 2Y+ Management programme focused on imparting skills for ensuring success, or at least ensuring remarkable levity above the bullshit that you will be surrounded with.  

It is a “plus” programme because the benefits will almost always outlast the course duration as you learn to smile outrageously through any muck, din or misfortune, even after the completion of 2 years. 

Our alumni boasts of our very own Conundrum Chaudhuri, whose warm smiles record the heat signature of a volcano on a night vision goggle. His warm smile continues to charm, into spot-on admission, indolent kids of business class in metros, guileless kids of farmer fathers, now with an acre less in their title deeds, in small towns and villages and almost every other person who believes Indians are smart enough to not see through the stinkpile that can be affectively clothed in a curvalicious smile. Ask Ram Vilas Paswan about that as he smilingly conquered camera men after winning the loser’s position from his own constituency, Hajipur.

We do not focus only on theoretical aspects, but also on practicalities as well. So, after imbuing our students with ground-breaking modules on putting up a smile, we will enhance the tuition fees to ridiculous levels, to see if you score well on practical implementation also. Those, seen with a frown, will not be left behind. They will be assigned to a month-long remedial internship with our programme partner, “Kingfisher Airlines”, as you all will learn to smile against rising costs, which is an important attribute of a business leader. Because if you are grumpy, you are not business friendly like Arvind Kejriwal.

Important Benefits of a Smile are wide-ranging in their occurrence and application and among other things, include, 1) getting yourself a promotion at office, after your well conditioned smile structured upon hours of training at our premier institute helps your boss to not see the scythe of death hiding behind your back during the annual appraisals, 2) help yourself tow-away public money in front of the public, right away from in front of them, because they are too blinded by your coruscating dentures, 3) To speak in so many words, without parting your lips, that All is Well (track changes, note 1 - editor’s note -  “should we wait to release this until the next photo-op for Dr. Manmohan Singh comes up?”, note 2 – writer’s note – “but he might give his resigning speech?”, note 3 – editor’s note – “speech? Even his dentist has not seen his mouth open”). 

  

Apply soon for the batch starting in June, 2014. 

If financing your education is your problem, then that is not a problem at all. Instead, it means you have a head-start than all other students as you will witness and learn how to create and maintain a smile perfectly right uptil the point the other’s money is in your basket. And all that will happen, once you apply to our banking partner, “Lena Bank”. 

After all who does not love to see a Subrata Roy smile, after carrying on one’s shoulders, the air of Rs. 20, 000 Crore worth of public money